I mean…I know who he is. Most of my followers on social media know who he is. Adding him to my writing spaces makes it official–he’s my guy. Granted they say you find someone when you stop looking, I usually fight that. I want to look everywhere. I felt like Paris wasn’t the place to do it, but I sort of…outsourced.
Trust me, the site I went on had a lot of “winners”, but not the kind you’d be thinking of. The kind of winners that you don’t give a chicken dinner, but you might have some fries ‘fore a frolic. Maybe a shake. He was different, and after looking over his first message to me, I cringed. It was a smiley cringe, because I thought it was a little corny, but I gave it a shot. He wasn’t hard on the eyes, and there was “something about him”.
There’s distance between us–Paris, TN and ATL–but the way we sort of picked up and went makes it worthwhile. You ever just…get into contact with something or someone, and feel this instant vibe of “I want” with no hesitation? That’s how I feel about him. We talk about everything, and it has gotten deep quickly–babies, the future, careers, all of it. I don’t feel rushed, either. This is exactly what I want! It happened quickly, but it felt so right. I didn’t feel rushed, and we spent a lot of time on the phone with each other.
When we met for the first time, that was it. I’m watching this handsome drink of water get out his car, with these nice cheekbones, gorgeous eyes, and facial hair…and I’m like “ho ho! JACKPOT!” in my head. Then we embraced, he looked into my eyes, and that was it. I was gone.
I will spare you the naughty bits. But they were amazing naughty bits.
He is the maturity I’ve wanted in a man, the kind of humor I like, and the knowledgeable kind of fellow that can not only teach a dame something, but be open to hearing my screwy ideas. We butt heads, yes, but the moments I have with him feel so natural. Sitting at IHOP and laughing, talking about our future together, or just chortling about nonsense. When he geeks out, it’s adorable. When he shows me something, or tells me about an anime, it’s heartwarming.
I was in bed with him one early morning, and the day was this hue of soothing blue that stunned me. I was wrapped up in him, and I just opened my eyes and savored the moment. I was picturing a life with him, in that twilight of blue. I was imagining a life every day like that, just on the mundane. It would be so perfect to wake up to that beautiful body every waking day. His warmth is soothing, his snoring is serene, and the softness of his skin feels so so good. Yet it was his company that filled me up. His company felt perfect, felt right, felt like a home I’d been looking for all this time. Gave me a fullness that I never knew could be.
How did I find it all so quickly?
I wrote this long ass intro on my profile of what I wanted, and he responded. And at first I was not going to put all that I did, but I was weeding out quantity over quality. Here he is, quality. This gem of a man who might get on my nerves sometimes, but has me smiling and laughing and maybe learning to love myself again. Someone who is very much grown up, but also has this side to him that’s like….nuts. He has made me blossom in a way that is so sudden, but long overdue. I could spend forever with a guy like that. Is this real?
And we don’t just talk about pop culture all the time. There is a lot of real life stuff. Perspectives on politics, equality, gender roles, ambition, family drama. We talk about things in such a way that it kind of feels like we have known one another all of our lives. And this is just us meeting together in the next lifetime.
I slipped and told him I loved him a few days back. It came out so naturally, but I meant it. I was embarrassed, but not regretting it. I fell for him hard, instantly. He shows so much care for me, with all his charm, his honesty, and his passion. To have someone so mellowing in my corner has been a wonderful experience. I want more of him. I want more of US. Do y’all know how long I’ve been looking for something like this? And feeling like I would never get it?
I intend to hold on to him. I intend to also be my own person, but as it stands–I am his. I am his, and he is mine. I’m off the market, swept into the arms of an amazing kisser who likes to cuddle and watch a variety of anime and action flicks. I’m into the universe of one who adores Star Wars, and is a handsome Blerd with a very bright future ahead of him. I’m nuts about someone who is good for this old soul.
He makes me feel like the most beautiful woman in the world.
That’s who Babe is–my heart.